Have You Ever Been Spit On?

 Not on accident when you’re sitting too close to the lecturer or your friend’s overly excited and starts screaming in your face… but like actually purposefully spit on??

I was last weekend.

At first, I was just so mad I couldn’t think about anything else except for being angry… I WAS LIVID! And then I started feeling bad for myself. Later the only thing I focused on was how I could teach this kid a lesson. I felt like this was the worst experience I’ve had so far in Armenia in the past two years and didn’t realize that this would also be one of the greatest learning experience of my time here. God really put me in a tough situation to see how I would handle it, and sure, at first, I didn’t handle it well, but as soon as I saw God in the whole situation, I was at peace, happy, and full of love for this kid. God knew I had the strength to overcome it.

So here’s the story:

Sunday afternoon my volunteer friend, Cortney, and I decided to walk from one village to the other just to get some exercise in. We met up at the store by my apartment complex and started our 1.5 hour walk. A couple young boys saw us walking and decided to follow us. At first they walked from a distance and didn’t bother us, but as soon as we were out of the village and on the road, they began asking questions and being somewhat rude. I asked them to leave us alone because we were having a serious conversation and that they shouldn’t be walking this far out of the village. Long story short, they wouldn’t leave us alone, walked for about 40 minutes behind us, and during this time would ask ridiculous questions and be, like I said, very rude.  Asked if Cortney and I were married, if he could have my phone number, if I smoked (offered me a cigarette!), and tried to take my water bottle out of my hand so he could have a sip. Cortney and I, early on, decided to answer some of their questions, but if it got out of line we would just ignore them and continue doing our thing, which is exactly what we did. That must have aggravated this one kid for some reason and he tried to kick some rocks at us, started running in-between us, laughing behind our backs, and make spitting noises (at least that’s what I thought he was doing). Finally, they flagged down a car driving by, got in, and left. As soon as they left, I looked at Cortney and said, “I don’t think it’s possible, but I have a weird feeling about something, can you check my back to see if they spit on me?” She looks at me in disbelief, “OH MY GOSH! SERIOUSLY?!?! They spit on you! Three times!,” she grabs some tissue from her pocket and wipes my back.  

The rest of the day I was just angry, upset, sad, and disappointed. I have been here for almost two years and I have never once had an incident like this. This feeling must have been a lot stronger than I realized because it just DEVOURED my whole spirit and attitude and lingered onto Monday, and then Tuesday… finally Tuesday night I said to myself, “OKAY, I need to fix whatever this slump is because it’s eating at me way too much and my poopy feeling is obviously showing to my students and people around me.”

I talked to Meghan, who’s my accountability partner here in Armenia, and ever since the incident she’s been telling me to pray and to really leave it up to God. I heard what she was saying and I knew she was right AND I really did want to do just that, but something was stopping me.

Later that night as I was laying in bed, my Whatsapp application on my iPhone starts buzzing like crazy and it’s Dasom responding to my “venting ramble” I wrote to my girls back at home on Sunday after the incident. From here on out, thing just clicked, my eyes were opened, and I was free…

Dasom:

Wow Andrea. When I was reading this, I felt like you were being persecuted like Jesus. Not for the same reason but still. And you got to experience a little bit of what He must have went through for us. I thought it was a huge blessing for you. Not that I'm happy that those kids did that to you but how God gives you a chance in every situation to see through His eyes. Forgive those poor kids and thank Jesus that He chose you to have this experience. I love you so much.

Me:

Dasom, you responding to me now is such perfect timing. I was just telling my accountability here, Meg, my situation and now here you are responding to me two days later but it's so perfect and it was like your words were exactly what I knew in the back of my head but couldn't hear it from myself.

Dasom:

Don’t you think there were kids in the crowd mocking and trashing Jesus?

 As I'm learning more about this spiritual battle, it's always the one who is angry that loses. I experienced this. You did nothing wrong, you did nothing to deserve that kind of treatment. But Satan will never let you stay up like you were during your birthday week! Ugh I hate him!

So when he tries to get you like this again, take a breath and send him away!

Me:

Seriously. And ever since the incident I've been like plotting how I can catch this kid and teach him a lesson and figuring out how I'd say ‘this and that’ in Armenian.

BUT NOW! When I was laying here listening to Him,

I know exactly what I'm going to say to him. And in Armenian too!

That I know what he did to me and that I forgive him. That he is special and I don't hate him. I'm sorry if he felt ignored or threatened by me. 

And that I love him and so does God. 

I want to call all those people that I know are looking for him now and tell them not to do anything to him if they find out who he is and that I want to deal with it in my own way. They're all so angry for me you know. And that’s great! I love knowing I have people who care about me and want to protect me. But the thing is, he gets that treatment all the time. Words of love and kind actions will do so much more that scolding and hitting.

AHHHH! I'm so much happier and lighter now. 

I haven't felt "right" since then but now I know…

It's cause it was Satan and instead now it's God!!

Kids!! I mean what has happened to these children that they feel the need to be mean like that. It's so sad.Children are supposed to be children. 

Innocent. You know? 

Ahhh now I probably have to give this kid a huge hug and some cookies.

Dasom:

But seriously, I teared up at your story because you’re my first Jesus that actually got spit on and ridiculed like Him. And I thanked God that you were my friend over there. In Armenia, experiencing this.

Who would have thought a terrible situation like this could turn out to be one of the greatest learning experiences of my life?!?! Who would have thought that I could be so happy about being spit on?!?!

The next morning I went to school feeling a lot better, less burdened, and more patient with my students. It was a good day and so was the next and the next.

Now it’s Saturday morning and I’ve written this blog, watered my flowers, got a call from the post office letting me know a letter has arrived for me (yay!!!), decided I’ll be making some carrot cake later tonight, and am on my way to do some laundry at TWO different families houses because they both invited me to use their laundry machines yesterday and I have so much laundry piled up I’ve decided to take half to one family and half to the other family! HAHA it’s going to be a splendid day J !!

.

25!! HALF OF FIFTY!! A QUARTER OF A CENTURY!!

It was my 25^th birthday a few days ago and for the first time EVER I actually did feel old. I know, I know… I’m still young and look like a teenager blah blah blah, but seriously, I’ve never actually felt like “whoa, years are passing by and I’m not a kid anymore.” Seeing these young 18-20 year old mothers in my village either pregnant, or already walking around with their second child makes me first think “WOW they’re young!” and then “oh my gosh, I want one!”…. THIS IS KIND OF FREAKING ME OUT!!

Ok ok, but besides all of this, I just wanted to write a post about this past week and how it really showed me the connections I’ve made here in Armenia and how truly valuable they are.

Friday. I was taken out to a fancy dinner at the Marriot Hotel by two fellow Peace Corps Volunteers (PCVs), Meghan and Lauren. They had so much going on that day and had to take a train to Tbilisi, Georgia that same night, but no matter what, they wanted to spend time with me and take me out for an early birthday dinner. But neither the fancy hotel restaurant nor the fact that they took out time for me was what was special about this night.  We spent most of our night complimenting and encouraging each other, sharing about how we personally thought we have grown in the past two years and how we thought the other has grown as well. It was the most uplifting and inspiring conversation... to know that other people can understand you so well, even though we don’t meet every day or have conversations all the time… AHHH!! It was just such a great night and I learned so much about myself through these two girls and was able to really see how this experience has made me a more easy-going, extroverted, wiser, happier, and better person! J

Left: Lauren and I on the way to Armenia! On a train in Venice.
Middle: the sweet gifts and letters from both the Meg & Lauren.
Right: Meghan! Like always, having great conversations everywhere.

A treat from the restaurant. It was perfect. They sang me an 'opera' happy birthday. 

Saturday. I spent the whole day at a hostel in Yerevan with my PCV friend Kate and we made cheesecake, popcorn, and mimosas, ordered pizza, and downloaded about five different movies we decided to watch. We had a good relaxing “birthday lounge day” and it was perfect. What topped it all off??? The cleaning lady at the hostel gave me a birthday gift the next morning! She told me it was just “a little something,” and then hugged and kissed me and wished me “all the blessings of this world.” Every time I come to this hostel I have nice conversations with her and every so often I have some extra apples or apricots or cookies or candies in my bag that I share with her, but I never thought I meant enough to her for her to give me a gift. I love to love and to be loved and to know that my love is seen and reciprocated unto others! How good is He, right?!

Sunday. Sunny Sunday! I got to go to church service for the first time in a very long time and it was just so good to sit, listen, worship, and praise with others around you doing the same. That was my Sunday highlight and I was so grateful I got to stay in Yerevan long enough to attend. YAY!

Monday. I went to my first host family’s house and got to see my host brother again after he spent eight months in Russia. Not only is he one of my favorite men in Armenia, but he truly acts like my older brother and will do anything to make sure I’m safe and happy. But I don’t want to talk about this for “Monday.” Him coming home from Russia was only a small perk compared to the gift I got from my host grandfather. My host grandpa had a heart attack ten years ago and ever since hasn’t been able to do anything. He’s blind, can’t speak cause half of his body doesn’t function, and sits on the couch all day. My host grandmother has been taking care of him for TEN YEARS! One of the strongest women I have ever known. Anyways, I love my host gpa in a way I can’t explain. We can’t have conversations and he doesn’t even know what I look like, but when I come over I always sit with him, hold his hand, and let him touch my hair because that’s one of the ways he recognizes others. My host gma can understand or guess what he says most of the time and usually he always asks the same questions, but this time it was different. My host gma tells me that lately he’s been asking where “that girl” was and if she’s doing okay (he can’t say my name, and neither can she actually!! Haha). This time I was sitting right next to him and he asked her again, “Where is that girl? What is she doing? Is she eating?” My host gma tells me what he asked and I respond to him saying “I’m here! I am good and am working in my village. And I eat all the time!” He touches my face and asks something, I look at my host gma and she translates, “do you have money?,” I turn to him and say “yes! I am okay. I have enough money,” but I guess he didn’t believe me and starts reaching for something in his sweater pocket. My host gma looks shocked and tells me he hasn’t reached for that pocket in more than five years and then goes to help him. She takes out what’s in the pocket, asks him what he wants her to do with it, and he waves at her motioning that he wants her to give it to me. It was money! He has kept 2,000 Drams in his pocket for more than 5+ years and he wanted to give one of those bills to me! Right at this moment my host father comes in, sees what is happening and says, “what?! I always try asking grandpa to give me money for cigarettes but he never does! He doesn’t give anyone money and has kept that money for almost ten years!” … CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!?! I have a 1,000 Dram bill in my wallet from a man who has been keeping it in his pocket for ten years. I almost cried. I actually don’t know how I kept myself together and didn’t cry. We may not be able to have a conversation, he may not be able to see me, and he may not know my name, but I am “that girl” to him, and I have never been happier in my life to be regarded without a name. TRUE LOVE!

Tuesday. My birthday. It was simple and not special, but SO SPECIAL. A day I’ll never forget. My host family has recently had many financial issues. They closed down their tiny shop, had to get loans for their son’s wedding, their other son didn’t find work in Russia, and their daughter recently got engaged meaning a lot of gifts and jewelry had to be bought. Basically they’re scavenging to survive and put food on the table, WHICH IS WHY I didn’t want to stay over on my birthday to make them feel like they have to do something for me, but they wouldn’t let me leave any earlier and basically kept me captive haha. Anyways, throughout the day I hear them talking about money here and there, bringing a few things from the market, and then my host mom and sister start making “dolma” for dinner that night… my favorite! Later that evening all seven of us, my host mother, father, brothers, sister, and gma, gathered around the small table and my host mom looks at me and says, “Andrea jan, our table might be small and not so special, but our hearts are big and we prepared everything out of love for you.” Are you breathless?? I mean… I felt like I ran out of air and was punched real hard in the face, but in a good way! AHHHH my heart stopped for a little as I took in the most humble and loving words this truly amazing family had for me. I don’t know what I’ll do when I have to leave in five months. I might actually get physically sick from separation…

From my first week in Armenia 'til now, this has been my family... always there for me, always treating me like their real daughter, and always giving no matter what their circumstances. Their love is just so overwhelming!

Wednesday. I came back to my village and went straight to my friend Anna’s house. She’s been wanting me to come over for days and I missed her and her family! As soon as I open the door, I get a kiss from Anna, a kiss from her mom, a kiss from her dad, and then a kiss from her brother AND THEN they pull me into the kitchen and I see a big pizza and a cake with a lit candle. Anna, her mom, and her brother had been preparing the pizza all day and were waiting for me to come so we could eat it together. Her dad comes in, says some nice things, and then scolds me for not coming over every day! Haha. I slept over that night to make sure I didn’t get another scolding from the whole family for not coming over more often! J They want me to live with them haha I love them.

 

Cake. Pizza. Gifts! Sleepover. Girls :) 

Left picture is of us on the first day we met almost 2 years ago at a conference introducing volunteers to their counterparts. Right picture was taken less than a month ago at their house in our village with Alla (in the middle) five months pregnant and living in Russia now!

How can anyone forget a birthday like this…

My community, family, friends, and kids here are engraved in me forever and I bet you every conversation I have with someone from here on until I die will most likely have a “when I was in Armenia…”

TO:

We had SO MANY polaroid moments, or "Roid Moments" as we call them. Special indeed.

A-21’s: Janessa, Jenny, Aislin, Kiki, Cyndi – everything leading up to this story is thanks to you girls. My overflowing “giddiness” and unusually big smile I took to school today was thanks to you girls. The way I see this second year of my Peace Corps service as a gift and so full of potential is thanks to you girls. My bad for the super “cheesiness” of this all, but honestly, this past weekend was like a cheesy love story for me and how I fell in love with all of you at first sight! I was hesitant about the weekend, about 90% sure I wouldn’t do the 5-hour bumpy ride over to Sisian, and honestly just wanted to be my introverted self and stay home. The day we spent together at the lake, our conversations, pizza dinner, and hair-braiding party were so EASY and I truly enjoyed myself. The compliments I received about the work I’m doing in my village, my hair-braiding skills, and just who I am as a person were encouraging in a way that made me see actual little changes I’ve helped create in the past year in my village and in myself, and how to me my work may seem minimal, but seeing that they weren't so small in the eyes of newcomers made me see the bigger picture of it all. Basically, what I want to say is “THANK YOU,” for letting me be ME, for making this weekend the best I’ve had in my time here in Armenia, for joining us A-20’s and making it feel as if we’ve been friends for ages, and having such over-the-top positive spirits. I’m so glad we can support each other and I can’t wait to get to know all of you even more! Wine Festival, yea?!?!

I am ever so lucky to have found a sister who enjoys her hair being braided as much as I enjoy experimenting with hair. Just too "Cinderella and her missing glass slipper" PERFECT of a match we are!

Phi - this is the reason why I didn’t end up calling you in Yerevan and didn’t have time to meet up!

Meghan - because the weekend you organized and encouraged me to come to really brought me a lot of hope and joy for our last year of service. The challenges and little pushes you’ve given me here and there have ALWAYS proven to be worth it and such a blessing in more ways than you can imagine! Our accountability and growth in each other and in God helped me to see all the good in what happened today and sparked my fire again, which has been horizontal for too long now! Tears and everything! This weekend made me realize that I have changed so much in the past year in ways that I couldn’t see, and the greatest part about those changes?! The new volunteers were the ones to point them out to me! WHO “WOULDA” THOUGHT?!?! I’m just really glad that I came and was able to meet these bright new beautiful girls who let me be ME. It was just SO easy and refreshing. Thanks for the perfect weekend at the most perfect time.

Lauren - because you’re the one who encouraged me to take chances with people and just see where things go. To not be so scared or think of the worst, and just go for it with full trust that there’s possibility of GREATNESS that’ll come from it. Two hours after our conversation, there I was standing in a grocery store being asked if I would be willing to take a walk with this stranger and just take some pictures. What do you think I ended up doing?! This story is 95% thanks to you!

               Now it makes me want to do what I NEVER thought I’d have the guts to do and travel around the world with just a backpack on my own and see where it takes me. It’s not scary anymore, it’s EXCITING.

________________________________________________________________________________     

. David From Iran .

“Excuse me, but I think maybe you can speak English?” was what he asked me in the supermarket. Rather than trying to figure out the answer, this is what was going on in my head, “I can either help him real quick and escape the situation OR help him and see if there’s more that can come from this.” Less than a year ago I would have tried to get rid of him as soon as possible and jet, but this time I thought of my conversation with Lauren a few hours ago about how she met amazing strangers on her trip alone to Turkey because she allowed it, was JUST contemplating about how I could waste two hours in Yerevan before my bus home, and kept hearing myself say “WHAT THE HECK! JUST DO IT!”

David from Iran who lives near the Caspian Sea, 32 years old, works for an Iranian oil company, and in Armenia for a week just because he felt like it. Oh, and LOVES Americans, apparently. Haha. 

We ended up walking around Yerevan for two hours together, had some really interesting conversations about Iran, humanity, his life and my life, I got two new baby plants for my apartment as a gift, and best of all I had someone carrying my backpack around for me when only two hours ago I was trying to figure out where I could sit and wait to not die from the heat! By the way, I’ve been looking for plants for MONTHS now and here I am receiving them as gifts from a perfect stranger. What made it THAT much better was that they were bought from this sweet little old lady hunched over on the corner selling these plants she nurtured and grew herself in old sour cream containers. Now you all know how much I LOVE the older folk and how much I LOVE supporting those who are truly passionate about what they are passionate about. You can imagine how overly joyful I must have been. What a beautiful BEAUTIFUL blessing that I wasn’t expecting today! And man was it written ALL OVER my face! David’s exact words were, “you’re blooming just like your plants. You really are a little angel.” Now he kept calling me an angel and complimenting me, and might I say I usually really can’t handle those kinds of words and they ‘erk’ me in a way that makes me twitch with dislike, but for some reason at that moment, in that situation, I was just so psyched to have taken this CHANCE, not knowing what could come from it, and it being SO FREAKN’ GOOD!

I took a leap of faith today. A test of confidence. A DARE.

                  It was the ONLY way I should have spent my afternoon.

                               The most ENCOURAGING way to start the new school year.           

                                               Sparked a flame in me to DO & LET GO.

                                                               THAT will be my last year in Peace Corps.

I still have to name them. Waiting 'til I see some personality :)

He recited this poem in Persian, which was such a beautiful language to listen to by the way, and translated it for me. My favorite part was, “You bring this tasty watermelon and it smells so wonderful, but what makes it smell better is the scent from your hands on the watermelon. Your hands smell better than watermelons.” I know it must sound so strange, but it really was so pure and gorgeous the way he said it in his native language and even the translations. Different cultures have different ways of expressing beauty and this one was definitely one I have never heard before… and I liked it. So Fresh.

            “Your hands smell better than watermelons.”

Now I must say it ended up getting a little strange towards the end when he started asking me about my love life, if I was married or had a boyfriend, etc. I told him I had a boyfriend back at home (haha no I don’t, but I thought it’d be smarter to say so) and he would ask me if I truly loved him, if we were going to get married, and that he wished he were in my (fake) boyfriends’ shoes. HAHA. Oh dear. Sorry for bursting this “perfect little fairy-tale story bubble” you were probably imagining it to become, but it did end up being a little too much for me and I left him saying goodbye & good luck with a handshake, and, unfortunately, a high-five (apparently that was his “thing”) haha.  

NONETHELESS! I DID IT! Went out of my comfort zone, took a chance, did something new, got to know a perfect stranger, and had, for the most part, a splendid time! AND I got two new additions to my family of plants! 

                                                            Not too shabby for Andrea.